My Father, the Panda KillerReview posted September 22, 2025.
Listening Library, 2023. 10 hours, 17 minutes.
Review written November 3, 2023, from a library eaudiobook.
Starred Review
My Father, the Panda Killer is the story of Jane, an American teen living in San Jose in 1999, the daughter of Vietnamese refugees. Jane’s mother left their family four years before, leaving Jane to go through high school as the mother of her little brother, then three years old. As well as giving her the responsibility to spend most of her time helping her father run their family convenience store. And bearing the brunt of her father’s unpredictable wrath and violent beatings.
Now it’s the summer after Jane’s senior year. She’s been accepted to UCLA, but doesn’t know how her father will respond to the news that she’s leaving. And she doesn’t know how to even begin to tell her brother that she won’t be there any longer to shepherd him through life and protect him from their father.
But alongside Jane’s story, we also hear the story of her father’s harrowing journey as a 13-year-old refugee from Vietnam. That part of the story is horrific with lots of death and life-threatening situations. But as Jane pieces together her father’s history, including a trip to Vietnam where she meets her grandparents for the first time, she begins to understand him better. As she understands her father better, she’s better able to understand herself and her heritage.
One little problem with this? I’m not sure I actually wanted Jane to come to terms with her father’s abuse in that way. I was reminded very strongly of the nonfiction book What My Bones Know,, by Stephanie Foo, and her C-PTSD and journey to come to terms with it through therapy as an adult. This book implies that even calling it abuse is a violation of Vietnamese culture. It left me feeling uneasy.
However, it certainly gave you sympathy and understanding for Jane’s father. In view of the horrors he endured, you can understand his ways of coping much better. So I was left not wanting to judge – but I still don’t think the beatings his daughter received are okay. Understandable, but not okay.
Anyway, the author note at the end said that the next book will be about the little brother – and his mother. I definitely want to read more. The interweaving of the father’s journey with the daughter’s conflicts was a big strength of the book. The front of the book says, “THIS IS NOT A HISTORY LESSON,” but at the same time the author points out that there aren’t many narratives of the Vietnam War told from the perspective of the Vietnamese people. At the very least, this book is valuable for filling that gap.